When everyone around you is speaking a different language, you can get paranoid. Or, at least, I can. But then I have to remind myself of how egotistical that is. If someone was talking about me, it would have to mean that I'm worthwhile enough -- or embarrassing enough -- to discuss and I know I'm not.
When I was in my teens and early twenties -- before I got onto anti-depressants -- I used to get really paranoid. I remember driving myself crazy, thinking that my college roommates were talking about me behind my back. Again, that would require that I am worth talking about and I'm not.
Shanghai isn't the backwoods where seeing a white person might be akin to seeing a yeti. Moreover, no matter where you go, American cultural exports like music and movies continue to put us front of mind.
The more I'm over here, the more angry I get about "whitewashing" of characters in movies. It's like I've said on the podcast several times: imagine being in a world where no one on TV or in movies looks like you do. Or, if they do, they're a horrible stereotype. Now, I don't think that seeing a white face will ever be a rarity, but maybe it should be once in a while just to help drive that point home.
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