B-Movie Weekend

My review of the B-Movie Celebration in 2010 was a rather whitewashed piece. I had fun while I was there, yes, but often in spite of the event itself. With expectations lowered appropriately, I kind of dreaded going back down to Franklin, Indiana in 2011 for another round of abuse.

The festival isn't all that bad. It's just that there's a lot of untapped potential there that I wanted to see come to fruition. If Cashiers du Cinemart writer Rich Osmond hadn't have been there, I would have skipped this year's event especially after so many of the announced guests and films ended up off the docket.

One of the biggest problems I have with the fest is the way that titles are trotted out and never happen. On the B-Movie Celebration Facebook group, there were three groups of films announced:

• Out of the 89 35mm films from March 30, zero are on the final list.
• Out of the 50 films from July 19, only 23 made the final cut (with two additional films not on any of the aforementioned lists).
• Out of the 25 scheduled films, only eight were shown in 35mm.

Seeing movies on film is a big deal to me. As it was, the projection in the main theater--the ArtCraft--wasn't too bad, even the digital stuff.

Over Friday and Saturday we saw seven films. The first night we caught the new Jim Wynorski film, Camel Spiders, shot partially in Franklin, IN. The main creatures don't look like camels nor do they seem like they're spiders (it's called out at least twice in the film that they only have six legs). That aside, the movie would feel right at home on the SyFy channel with the cheesy special effects. It was good to see C. Thomas Howell in the film as the local sheriff, though I wish he'd had a little more to work with.

The second feature on Friday, Fred Olen Ray's Dino Wolf, proved to be most enjoyable. Maxwell Caulfield as the sheriff in this one was a real treat and really helped set the movie apart.

We started the next day with Varan: The Unbelievable, a Japanese film (Daikaijû Baran) that had been re-cut and padded out with American footage. The film really defies the viewer to pay attention to it. And, being shown at 10AM, several folks in the audience nodded off (including yours truly).

At noon we headed over to the (not so) Secret Theater. I'm not sure what purpose the building serves usually but two of its rooms had been turned into screening areas. We only went into the first one where it looked like paper had been tacked up onto the wall for a screen. The movie we caught, Tony Randel's Ticks, was terrific despite being marred by technical difficulties. It was shown in the wrong aspect ratio (making a lot of the female actresses' behinds look really big) and with the center sound channel completely missing. This rendered the music and sound effects perfectly audible with the dialogue completely muffled.

Despite this, I still enjoyed the film but we swore off going back to the Secret Theater for the rest of our time.

We headed back to the ArtCraft for the 1966 Batman movie. I'd never seen it before I it was quite a treat. I don't remember laughing so much at a movie in a long time.

I also did a lot of laughing at Roy Ward Baker's Legend of Seven Golden Vampires which was unintentionally hilarious, especially as some of the same sequences of film were used repeatedly; the movie seeming to start three times before finally moving forward.

Up next at the ArtCraft were the Golden Cob Awards. Knowing that I hadn't won anything, Rich and I adjourned to dinner for a while.

We came back for the festival's main attraction, a screening of Killer Klowns from Outer Space on 35mm with the Chiodo brothers as guests and a post-screening Q&A done by Joe Bob Briggs. I'd never seen KKFOS before so this was the ideal way to do it.

With the Secret Theater out and the fare at the ArtCraft not appealing we headed back to the hotel to talk about truck driving music.

When all was said and done, B-Movie Celebration was fine. Could have been better but it wasn't too bad. I'll probably be skipping out on BMC from now on, looking for an event that caters more to cinephiles.

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They have tournaments for that?

Impossibly Funky Comes from Detroit to Conquer the World!

For fourteen years Detroit author/editor Mike White toiled nights and weekends on his movie zine Cashiers du Cinemart. Starting as a scrappy xerox and stapled publication, the zine mutated over time to a magazine with international distribution, long after the siren song of the internet wooed most small publishers to its cheap epublishing. Now, the best of Cashiers du Cinemart has been collected into one volume, 2010's Impossibly Funky, a treasure trove of articles about film and popular culture.

White will be appearing with various guest stars in a Midwest tour in Autumn 2010, reading, signing copies of his first book, and doing occasional movie/shorts screenings.

• November 17 - Copacetic Comics - RSVP on FB - 3138 Dobson Street, Pittsburgh PA 15219 (WSG Cover illustrator Jim Rugg)
• November 18 - Midtown Scholar - RSVP on FB - 1302 North Third Street, Harrisburg PA 17102
• November 18 - Raconteur Books - RSVP on FB - 431 Main Street, Metuchen, NJ 08840 (WSG author Leon Chase, and screening of Cockfighter)
• November 19 - Atomic Books - RSVP on FB - 3620 Falls Rd, Baltimore, MD, 21211 (WSG author Mike Faloon)
• November 20 - The Windup Space - RSVP on FB - 12 W. North Avenue Baltimore, MD 21201 (MicroCineFest screening of John Paizs's Crime Wave)
• November 21 - Chop Suey Books/James River Film Society - RSVP on FB -Gallery 5, 200 W. Marshall St., Richmond, VA (w/Screening of Cockfighter)
• November 22 - Moviate - RSVP on FB - Mantis Collective Gallery, 1306 N 3rd St, Harrisburg, PA 17102-1970 (Screening of Black Shampoo)
• November 23 - Washington Psychotronic Film Society - RSVP on FB - The Passenger, 1021 7th Street NW, Washington, DC 20001 (w/Screening of Phantom of the Paradise)

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Notes from the B-Movie Celebration

About a half hour south of Indianapolis rests the sleepy town of Franklin, IN. This town hides a secret. Behind its idyllic facade creep monsters, dastardly villains, killer robots, and other things that go bump in the night: they're just all part of the fun for participants at the annual B-Movie Celebration.

Running from September 24-26, 2010, the B-Movie Celebration is the brainchild of Bill Dever -- a fan-turned-filmmaker who unveiled his latest production, Monster Cruise on the fest's opening night. Monster Cruise was one of two films directed by Jim Wynorski who was also part of the festival as the subject of Popatopolis, a great gonzo documentary.

My second trip to the B-Movie Celebration (I also attended in 2008), I met up again with Cashiers du Cinemart contributor Rich Osmond for a weekend of movies and hanging out. This time we were accompanied by Justin Bozung of Mondo Video and Jason Payne of Gut Munchers. Also making a special cameo appearance was Richard Edwards of Out of the Past. Along with watching movies, Edwards, Payne, Bozung and I took part of the "State of Indie Film Criticism" panel on Saturday afternoon where we gave a gut (munch) check of how things are in the world for folks writing and talking about film from a diverse range of viewpoints.

Our panel went pretty well with maybe a dozen people in attendance at the Franklin City Hall where we took over the city council's chambers. This unusual setting was the scene for the "B-Movie Classroom" and entertained discussions of being a "Scream Queen" by Jessica Cameron as well as a director's roundtable with Jim O'Rear and Mark Burchett.

Along with the historic Aircraft Theater, this year the B-Movie Celebration got out of the local museum's basement and got into the nearby Canary Creek theaters where festival attendees could take advantage of the Canary Creek drive-in. You could find me at the drive-in on Saturday night for the bizarre double feature, The Rocky Horror Picture Show and Nomads (yes, the one with Pierce Brosnan and Adam Ant).

For the most part, I'd seen most of the films that I caught at this year's B-Movie Celebration with the exception of the cowboys vs. dinosaurs film The Valley of Gwangi. Along with The Rocky Horror Picture Show, I was thrilled to see The American Astronaut and share it with folks that had never experienced Cory McAbee's masterpiece before.

I didn't sell a lot of books in Franklin but not for lack of trying. I plugged Impossibly Funky a few times during the State of Indie Film Criticism panel and Director's Roundtable, had an interview in the local Metromix (thanks to writer Shawna Kenney), and made an appearance on Film Soceyology on WFYI.

I'd point you over to the B-Movie Celebration website for more information about the festival, the special guests, and other movies that showed but it's pretty inaccurate. So, I'll just say that I had a fun time over the weekend; I met some great people, hung out with friends, had some amazing grub, and certainly have some stories to tell from it all.

State of Indy Film Review

What:	State of Indy Film Review Panel
When:	Saturday September 25 - 2:30 PM
Where:	B-Movie Classroom 1, Franklin, Indiana
Who:	Mike White, Jason Payne, Justin Bozung, Richard Edwards and more*

A look at the present state of Indy Film criticism; not indie films but the indie folks that review them. This panel of zinesters, bloggers, and podcasters will discuss the fodder they review, the way they deal with their outsider status, the DIY aesthetic, and what motivates them (and leagues of others) to dedicate so much time to the movies.

Justin Bozung is the head honcho at www.mondo-video.com. Jason Payne is the co-founder of the Gutmunchers podcast (www.gutmunchers.com). Richard Edwards comprises half of the "Clute & Edwards" team behind the Behind the Black Mask and Out of the Past podcasts. Mike White is the founder/editor of the zine Cashiers du Cinemart (www.impossiblefunky.com).

The panel takes place at the B-Movie Celebration in Franklin, Indiana which runs from September 24-26, 2010.

*We're currently looking for fellow zinesters/bloggers/podcasters to join the panel discussion. Please leave a comment on this post if you're hip to it!

We Control The Vertical - We Control The Horizontal

"It was much funnier than Cats. I want to see it again and again."

Impossibly Funky - On Tour

I'm slowly working on putting together a tour of Impossibly Funky. I've been reaching out to a bunch of bookstores and looking for others with the hope of doing a reading, signing, and/or movie screening. Everything's still pretty up in the air but here's what I've got penciled in so far:

September - The book won't be out yet but I'll be supporting it and at the 2010 B Movie Celebration in Franklin, IN (Sept 24-26). I'll be moderating the directors' roundtable and maybe some other fun stuff. Also, while I'm over there, I'd love to see if I can hit a hipster store in Indianapolis -- does such a thing exist?

October - Still hoping to get a consensus on what day/time will work best to get the biggest turnout at an event at the Burton Theater in Detroit for a book release party. It'd be a reading/signing and screening of Black Shampoo as well as some shorts. So far the leader of my poll seems to be Sunday afternoon.

October will also be the month of my blog tour. If you're unfamiliar with what that means, it's that I'm going to hit up thirty (or so) bloggers to review the book and post reviews on a daily schedule. This can also include podcasters. Then every day I'll be tweeting and facebooking the shit out of these reviews/podcasts. I've been making a list of some hip film blogs but I'm open to suggestions. If you have any particular favorites (or want to be a part of the madness), please leave a comment.

November - Will November spawn a monster? Perhaps. The first weekend of the month I'll be attending Noircon 2010 in Philadelphia. I've been trying to extend my stay a day before or after Noircon to do an event at a local bookstore. Of the two stores I've solicited so far, neither have gotten back to me. Hopefully I'll either hear from them soon or will find another hip store to welcome me.

A few weeks later I'm planning on driving down to Baltimore for a weekend of debauchery with my old friends from the MicroCineFest. I'm working with Atomic Books to set up a reading with me and Mike Faloon, author of Hanging Gardens of Split Rock for "A Night of Mikes".

Additionally, I'm working with the Washington Psychotronic Film Society and Chop Suey Books to do events in DC and Richmond, VA. I'm kind of hoping to find another venue or two.

There's also a good chance of a film screening/book event in Baltimore that weekend with some of the former MicroCineFest folks in attendance. I know that Skizz is busier than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest right now so I'm not promising anything just yet.

On the way down to Baltimore, I'm going to be going through Cleveland and Pittsburgh and hope to find some cool places in those major cities to do more shilling. I'm also looking for places within driving distance to Philadelphia and Baltimore -- maybe in New Jersey or even (gasp) New York?

And, as Detroit is mid-way between Toronto and Chicago, I'd really like to do book events in both of those cities. I have a few "dream places" in mind. Wish me luck with those.

To repeat myself, if you know of any hip places or blogs/podcasts where Impossibly Funky would be welcome, please let me know.

More about B-Movie Celebration

Franklin Indiana will be hosting the Fourth Annual B Movie Celebration September 24th, 25th and 26th 2010. The Celebration will feature screenings of over 50 classic B movies. There will also be personal appearances from such B Greats as B Director Jim Wynorski, Tony Randel, Bert I. Gordon.The highlight of the celebration will be the presentation of the coveted Gold Cob Awards, celebrating the best of genre cinema.

The celebration will also feature over 20 educational seminars dealing the art of the B film and topics will include: Directing B Movies, Acting for B's, Music Composition, Director's Roundtable, Writing workshop. This year, we are paying tribute to THE ASYLUM, Roger Corman and Mid West Movie Mavericks, Kroger Babb, K. Gordon Murray and William Girdler.

For further information head on over to www.bmoviecelebration.com

2008: Year in Review

2008 was a year filled with travel and new adventures.

January

Early in the year, Andrea and I were invited to Cancun to spend Christmas with her family. This prompted us to sit down with a calendar and go over all known and desired trips for the year. We sketched out quite a few long weekends for us and film festival trips for me. We didn't hit everything that we ended up doing but we were close. Rather than doing one long Mexican vacation in December we chose small trips throughout the year.

February

We started off February with a trip to Las Vegas and a stay at the Planet Hollywood Casino. We really lucked out on this. As (free) members of the Flamingo's "casino club" program, we were sent a postcard for two free nights at the newly-opened Planet Hollywood. "What's the catch?" I asked the customer service representative. She promised that there wasn't any and, wouldn't you know, she was right.

Two nights at the casino, a $50 credit for one of their restaurants, and a free show (their proprietary version of Stomp). We just had to get the flight out and I used miles for it, making this one of the cheapest trips we could do. I spent a lot of the trip reading The Lost One: A Life of Peter Lorre by Stephen D. Youngkin. It just about broke my arms (it's a weighty tome) but it definitely aided my appreciation of one of my favorite character actors.

March

It was in March when I made the fateful decision to finally give up the ghost and let Cashiers du Cinemart die a dignified death. I pulled the plug on my ailing publication and dedicated much more of my mental faculties to writing for pay. I had been losing money with my writing since 1994 and only made my first penny from a word of prose in late 2007. This felt pretty good and I wanted to keep getting checks (however paltry) for what I had been giving away (at a significant loss) for so many years in the pages of my zine.

By April I was still writing for Detour-Mag.com and added Detroit's Metro Times to my regular repertoire of places to contribute. I approached a few other publications but was thwarted at every turn, usually because my whacked-out sensibilities of cinema just don't play too nice with others.

April

My trip to Philadelphia for the first annual Noircon gathering was rather fateful. I was on a discussion panel for David Goodis's "The Professional Man" with the ever-eloquent Howard A. Rodman and met a number of folks who would appear later in starring roles in 2008 including Noircast.net podcasters Shannon Klute and Richard Edwards. I also finally met Megan Abbott. She's writing novels now, but I remember reading her stuff in the Michigan Daily back when I was in college. And, I also had the pleasure of making the acquaintance of Melanie G. Dante who's since invited me to be a part of a book project for 2009.

Speaking of books... Cashiers du Cinemart wasn't even cold yet when I decided to start picking flesh from its bones; cannibalizing my past and putting together a "Best of" collection in book form. This started the ball rolling on a project that would fill many hours for the rest of the year.

I also stopped by the Toronto branch of my employer where I hung out for a couple days and spent the evenings with friends. Rita Su and I checked out Evil Dead: The Musical and had a blast.

May

The month started off with a bang as I headed down to Baltimore to partake in the Maryland Film Festival where I moderated a panel on the state of film criticism in this cyber age as well as watched a lot of movies and hung out with some dear friends. It's always a treat to be in Charm City.

I ended the month with an equal bang, heading back to New York City after many years. Andrea and I did the "tourist thing"; taking a tour of the city via double-decker bus. It was a hoot. We also caught Avenue Q and even managed to have dinner with my old friend Leon Chase. I still regret that I missed the performance of his new band, Sister Anne.

June

Andrea and I took one of those mini-trips in June over to Niagara Falls. It was a blast. We did all the touristy things you can do without going broke; Maid of the Mist, Journey Under the Falls, the Butterfly House, et cetera. We stayed away from the tourist trap center of town until the last day when we did the overly expensive Ripley Museum. Fun, but pricey! Again, we got to hang out with a good friend. Dion Conflict drove down from Toronto and we all went to the Flying Saucer restaurant. Excellent.

July

Shannon and Richard from Noircast.net asked myself and Howard A. Rodman to participate in their show. Together we did an episode on Jean-Pierre Melville's Bob le Flambeur. It was a hoot.

I continued to work on proofreading/cleaning up of old articles and gathering them for inclusion in the Cashiers du Cinemart book.

August

The month started with a whirlwind trip to San Francisco/Berkeley where I introduced Shoot the Piano Player as part of the Streets of No Return film series - films all based on the works of David Goodis. This tied in nicely to the feature I did on Goodis in the last issue of CdC.

This year I gave up another thing I had been doing for years - I stopped running SuperHappyFun.com, a bootleg DVD site.

September

I would say, "As usual, I went up to Toronto for the Toronto International Film Festival," except that this year may be my last TIFF. I was so disappointed in their lineup and they way that the festival was run; I'm looking into other, better fests that will fit my schedule and tastes more. I've got a short list going but, so far, none are as convenient as TIFF.

I did have fun at the B-Movie Celebration in Franklin, Indiana in September, too, and that's definitely on the short list. It was there/then that I finally got to meet fave director Greydon Clark.

October

With the fall, I began my annual hibernation. The Cashiers du Cinemart book manuscript was in the hands of Lori Higgins all month as she continued to finesse and polish the prose from me and my fellow contributors. I finally got down to work on the piece I'm contributing to a journal in 2009. I'm still not giving too many details about it, in case it falls through. Suffice to say, I spent every weekend watching Fetish/BDSM-related films to expand upon an article I had done earlier in 2008 for the Metro Times. I actually started to get burned out on watching people flog one another. LOL.

November

Research on my articles continued. Weekends were spent taking care of family stuff with my Grandmother passing away the second week of the month.

I got the foreword to the book and was absolutely floored. News on that should be coming in early 2009, I hope. Lori wrapped up her layout and handed the project back to me at the end of the month.

December

I'm back to going over the manuscript for the Cashiers du Cinemart book. One final polish, I hope. There should be some more announcements about this project soon. It sounds like the journal I'm writing for will be out around the same time as the book which will be nice. I'm wondering if I should hold off on taking much more than my January vacation(s - to Las Vegas and Cleveland) and seeing about doing some kind of "book tour" later in 2009.

2008 has been one hell of a ride.

B-Movie Celebration

Walking through the quiet city of Franklin, Indiana shortly after nightfall on a temperate autumn evening; the shops have closed, the traffic down the main thoroughfare light enough to give the impression that the town is abandoned. The lights change robotic despite the lack of cars to stop. A dog barks in the distance, adding perfectly to the air of loneliness that the town possesses.

I round the corner of E. Jefferson and Main and breathe a sigh of relief. I've found what seems to be the entire population of this tiny burg. The short block seems illuminated solely from the lights of the Artcraft Theater marquee. People mill about the entrance to the theater while custom cars line the street. Across the street a small screen is set up - I would later find out that this was "Franklin Beach", the venue for several music acts and outdoor screenings.

I have reached the heart of the B-Movie Celebration, a three day event of movies and the maniacs who make 'em. From Troma trash to Spaghetti sublime, the B-Movie Celebration was awash in some interesting fare.

What brought me to Franklin, Indiana was the combination of hanging out with Cashiers du Cinemart contributor Rich Osmond (Franklin's about midway between St. Louis and Detroit), meeting fave director Greydon Clark, and, of course, the movies. The initial list of films sent out in July left me salivating, especially with the promise of "many in glorious 35mm" -- a vague statement that left me a little disappointed.

The venues for the festival were a little questionable; especially the screen set up at the Benjamin's Coffee Shop. I was hoping to see Death Race 2000 on the massive screen at the Artcraft in glorious 35mm instead of projected on a tiny screen in the front of a working store where every customer was a distraction. Meanwhile, the seats at the Johnson County Museum venue were unmerciful on my bulbous behind. But, like Momma Bear's bed, the Artcraft was just right, especially when they broke out the 35mm prints of For A Few Dollars More, Fright Night, The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, Transylvania Twist, etc. Seeing these rarities, scare-ities, and hilarities on the big screen like they were meant to be seen was a priceless treat.

I also attended a few sidebars featuring the writers and directors of some of the films featured including a rather enjoyable romp with a handful of directors including Greydon Clark, Tom Holland, Jim Wynorski, Lloyd Kaufman, Kelley Baker, and more: definitely an eclectic group!

Many of the proceedings were hosted by horror hosts Mr. Lobo and the lovely Queen of Trash. I was afraid they'd be cringe-worthy cheeseballs but they were anything but. They did a fine job handling introductions and Mr. Lobo even ran the Director's round table for a while.

Other highlights of the weekend included hanging out with Out of the Past honcho, Richard Edwards and family for dinner; talking movies as much and as fast as we could at the local pub, and finally meeting Greydon Clark, the man behind my favorite film, Black Shampoo.

I tried my best to not be a gushing fanboy when finally face to face with Clark. He was wonderfully effusive, introducing me to Tom Holland and talking about how wonderful Cashiers du Cinemart is. I presented Clark with a rough proof of the Cashiers du Cinemart book manuscript, asking if he'd be open to giving me a back cover blurb. He was so agreeable that I hit him up with, "Oh, and how about I run some behind-the-scenes images from the movie, too? And I'll need your permission for those, of course." He was all too happy to help with whatever I asked. The next morning he handed me a stack of promotional photographs, a mini poster of Black Shampoo and a pack of ad slicks so well-preserved that they looked as though they'd been printed only the day before.

I was thrilled to see that the 2PM Sunday screening of Clark's Without Warning managed to get one of the larger turn-outs of the festival. I'd never seen Without Warning on the big screen or with an audience so both were a treat. It was wonderful seeing Jack Palance and Martin Landau facing off in an over-acting contest while being pursued by an early version of The Predator. It made me wonder what forces could come together to get a screening of Black Shampoo, Satan's Cheerleaders, or Joysticks on the big screen...

I only wish I could have stayed longer and chatted more with the fine folks behind the fest. Alas, I had to hit the road and get back to my day job the following day.

For more photos visit Flickr.com.

Weekend Plans?