Silent Library (Japanese Game Show)

An absolutely hilarious Japanese Game Show. Contestants can’t get too loud after they take their punishments from the Wheel of Pain and Humiliation.

Ho Ho Ho, Now Go.

I've gotten to a point in my life where I'm cleaning out my address book. Not my literal address book. Actually, I don't have a literal address book. I've been using an online database for addresses for years now and have never comittedthat kind of info to paper in one place. If I were smart, I'd add another field for birthdays and somehow create an online calendar and reminder system... wait, wait. I'm getting ahead of myself here.

The point I'm trying to make is that I've been deleting some of those addresses. I've also been clearing out old names in my Yahoo Instant Messanger, AIM, and even my cell phone. The criteria is simple -- I was the last person to initiate contact and I haven't heard back from the person in months, if not years. My mother was always fond of saying, "The phone works both ways." I think I get this paring down of contacts from her.

I find at times that I've gathered into my good graces individuals who demand too much of my time, space, or energy. These are the folks that make me feel stupid or used. "Why am I still friends with this person? I don't have a good time with them and they leave me exhausted or frustrated every time I see them." I don't like asking myself this question but I find myself doing it too often. I think back to all of the one-sided Christmas or Birthday exchanges. I don't always expect reciprocation but, uh... well... yeah, I guess I do.

Chrismas is the perfect time to prune the dead wood. It makes that budgeting for the holiday easier.

I don't want to harsh anybody's cool here. I just find this time of year a period of reflection, mourning, and vindictive social attacks.

Bust You Out with My Super Sperm

So, I'm a geek. You know it. I admit it, freely. I get all up in arms about Greedo firing first and about the removal of the voiceover in BLADE RUNNER. I get perplexed when the gyro pilot doesn't recognize Max in BEYOND THUNDERDOME. I threw my popcorn at the screen when ghosts and vampires were explained to be errant "programs" in MATRIX REVOLUTIONS. Yeah, that's me. Nerdus Supremus.

But even I can't had to sign off of the recent discussions over at OriginalTrilogy.com regarding the Richard Donner re-cut of SUPERMAN II. Some of it I found fun to see, sure, and some of it was pretty awful (yeah, I know that S2 was supposed to end with the "world spinning backwards bit" but that doesn't mean that it should have been used in this version). But the thing I find funniest -- or saddest, depending on my mood -- is the insistence of keeping a consistent timeline between the 1970s/80s Superman films and the blight that was SUPERMAN RETURNS.

Some of the folks on this forum are fighting tooth and nail to try and reconcile Bryan Singer's SUPERMAN RETURNS with these Donner / Lester / Furie films and are now in a tizzy about the "reset back to zero" ending of this Donner cut. As this is a fan-editing forum, they're trying to figure out how to sustain continuity between these earlier films and the sloppy Singer seconds. The biggest sticking point when I finally found myself bashing my head against my keyboard was the existence of Supes' sickly Adam Rich hair-cut wearing tyke:

Lois and Clark's conception of Jason: It doesn't matter if Superman's sperm was still in Lois before he reversed time. The time reversal negated that, just as the time reversal in S:TM negated Lois being dead. There was no other opportunity for Jason's conception to happen, regardless of Singer's apparent suggestion of it happening he night of Lois' first interview with Superman.

Yes. You read that right... we're talking about Superman's sperm here. Gotta make sure that that sperm didn't just reverse course and eject itself out of Lois Lane when Superman spun the earth backwards. Otherwise, she might have the traditional SUPERMAN II "amnesia kiss" and just realize that she's pregnant some day -- perhaps before SUPERMAN III...

I've been mulling over SUPERMAN RETURNS for the last few months and I just can't deny that it's a really awful film. It's not just an awful SUPERMAN movie (like SUPERMAN IV: THE QUEST FOR PEACE) but just an awful film in toto. The pacing, the plot, the characters, the writing, the acting, the costumes, the editing; they're all bad. I wasn't even too thrilled with the musical score. The best part of the movie, for me, was the preview.

Some gripes:

• Why would Lex Luthor, the greatest criminal mind of our times, need to marry a rich woman and take her money after death? Seems like this is an overly complicated scheme for financing.
• Superman returns from Krypton... even after he knows it was blown up... why the fuck did he go?
• Superman returns from Krypton... You'd think that the first thing he would do after a five year absence is to maybe check on the whereabouts of his arch nemesis.
• What era is this movie? The costumes look rather '40s but there are anochronistic items all over.
• Some lines worked so well in the first movie(s), let's use 'em over again and remind people how we're raping their memories.
• Superman as creepy voyeur constantly watching Lois in her house with his X-ray vision and sneaking into his son's room at night.

• His son's awful haircut.
• Wow, that island is beautiful, Lex. I'm sure it'll be a great place to live.
• Superman thou art Jor-El's only begotten son and thou shalt be resurrected.
• Horribly jarring cuts to the Lex Luthor subplot.
• Parker Posey as Miss Teschmacher -- but not quite.
• Lex cutting the brakes on Kitty's car.
• Superman lifting a continent made out of Kryptonite into outer space.
• No one recognizing Cyclops as Lois Lane's husband. ;)
• All of the build-up over the use of Marlon Brando footage in this film -- only to have it be a few seconds and not very visible.

Okay, those are all the ones that come to mind immediately but I know there are others. Oddly, continuity between SUPERMAN RETURNS and the original films doesn't enter into it, except the recycling of lines from SUPERMAN ("Statistically speaking, it's still the safest way to travel.") that caused me to squirm in my seat. Otherwise, I was most disappointed that this felt very much like a "by the numbers" superhero movie with the exception of the uncomfortable love triangle subplot.

Geek out.

I Weigh 325 lbs.

I'm not sure what my top weight was back in 1996 but I think that I've managed to beat it. That's not a good thing. I weigh 325lbs. and I'm not happy about it.

Believe it or not but I sat down (in my 50 inch waist pants) and wrote out a list of reasons why I should actually give a shit and lose some poundage. I love to eat and I hate to exercise so weight loss and I don't often see eye to eye. The last time we did, back in 1997, I had taken charge of my life and had almost an anorexic obsession with food. I'd like to take back that control but do it a little more sanely.

1. Pants fit better
2. Better selection of clothes
3. Better self image
4. Save money on food
5. Less winded
6. More respect
7. Can make fun of fat people again
8. Live longer
9. Snore less / sleep better
10. Fewer aches/pain
11. More room on airplanes
12. Can return to Cedar Point

It's one thing to complain about it but quite another to do something about it. I've been taking some steps that I hope will help:

1. No more fast food. Ever.
2. Cut back on meat.
3. Play "Dance Dance Revolution" (game pad and game on order)
4. Walk (iPod will come in handy)
5. Drink more water.
6. No more coffee (I doctor it up with tons of cream)
7. Eat more fruit/vegetables
8. No more beer

I'm hoping that I can shame myself into facing up to my fat and taking steps to help curb my overeating. I'm also going to look into taking some exercise classes -- I used to do this and it helped tremendously. However, my instructor was also a good friend of my ex-wife's. Hoping to find a nice, nonjudgemental exercise program that works with a 9-5 work schedule.

As God is my witness, as God is my witness they're not going to lick me. I'm going to live through this and when it's all over, I'll always be hungry again. If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I'll always be hungry again.

Xmas Memories (2005)

Xmas 2005 was awful. I managed to make it to my Xmas gig at my mom's place -- though I felt tired and a little ill. I think I napped for a few hours. Andrea's Dad and his wife, Julie, were down for a few days. I wasn't much company. After Andrea's big Xmas Eve meal -- which I only managed to eat a few bites of -- I proceeded to get rid of it and all else that I ate that day. I was in a bad way. It hurt to eat. It made me ill to even laze around. I wasn't having much to do with the world. I tried to spend as much time as I could in bed.

Andrea recommended that I go to some kind of Urgent Care facility but I didn't want anything to do with that. After living with a hypochondriac for years (my ex-wife), I hated to admit to myself when I was sick and actually in need of more than hot tea with honey. I had tried self-medicating to the extreme but as of 3 a.m., I had had enough.

Bleary eyed and throat screaming in pain, I hopped in the car and made my way to what I thought would be open before the crack of dawn on Chrismas. Darn it all, but I was completely wrong. I kept driving, hoping that I could remember another Emergency Room that would take our insurance. Miles later, I found it. I checked in around 4 a.m. and checked out around 7 a.m. after I had been diagnosed with strep throat and given some hard-core antibiotics.

I made my way home and slept for a few hours before getting up. By that time, Gary and Julie had gone. What great company I was, eh? I got up, opened up my laptop, and signed in to work, popping my prescribed pills with some hot tea. Yes, I was sick in a completely different way. I was a workaholic as well. I knew that I had stuff I needed to do and worked through the afternoon and into the night on it. I decided to call in the next day -- one of my few sick days -- but still kept getting calls and emails. I took them all and responded to every one. I took my job so seriously!

That's the ironic part, I suppose. For when I dragged my sorry ass into work two days after Xmas, barely able to talk, I worked through the day as best I could until 3 p.m. when I was called into my boss's office and fired. Merry fucking Christmas.

I'm still tying up loose ends from that whole mess of my five plus years at ePrize. Still need to transfer over my 401K to my new account and I still need to get some hassles worked out over some stock options. That's my goal for this week -- to get that shit sorted out so I can't say that it's taken me a year to do so.

But, yeah, even though we're having company -- which means cleaning and entertaining -- I know that this year will definitely be better than the last.

Blotto - I Wanna Be A Lifeguard

Heard this the other night on XM. Gosh, I love XM radio. I don't think I've ever heard/seen this song before. I do so enjoy.

Xmas Wishes From Chewy

Chewbacca here would like to wish you Season's Greetings.

Perfect Xmas Gift

I'm trying out a new image hosting service. So far I haven't been too impress with www.weblogimages.com -- when I tried to upload a song it wasn't recognized as being an mp3, even though it was. And, as the URL they give images isn't a straight ".gif" or ".jpg" extension, they're not recognized by places like MySpace or some of the forums I post to. That limits my options and curtails my needs...

Anyway, here's an image I posted. I think it's the perfect Xmas gift for the hirsuit person in your life.

Montreal Mojo

Rich Osmond and I have been tossing around dates, facts, and figures and have finally nailed down our agenda for the trip to Fantasia in Montreal that we'll be taking in July 2007. Yeah, we plan ahead. Kind of necessary with the "get your time in" world of vacations.

Rich is going to be flying up and then we're driving to Montreal. I couldn't believe how crazy expensive flights were from Detroit to Montreal. We're talking $500+ (US) a ticket. That's insane. I don't know if it was that I was looking seven months early -- but I would think that an earlier search would yeild lower prices than a later one (probably some backwards logic to contend with here).


It'll be a pretty straight shot (especially as we won't be taking the Sarnia detour that Google Maps has us taking) and we're going to stop off in Toronto for a night on the way out so we don't have to rush so much on that second day of driving. Also, we'll be indulging in some Korean BBQ in TO if all goes right.

I sure hope that the folks I run into in Montreal are more polite than the f'ers that hassled the kids in ANOTHER STATE OF MIND...